routines

Hi friends,

Each weekday during lunch, I walk from my office to Mallika's daycare, pick her up, and take her home to spend the afternoon in her papa's loving care.  I have 90 minutes to make a somewhat hectic (ok, sometimes very hectic) round-trip trek on foot while also making it a point to actually eat something and also at least say hello to my spouse.  However, it's always good to get out of the office, move the bod, experience the weather, etc etc.

The routine is about to change, though, and I suddenly don't feel ready for it.  Most days, starting tomorrow, Mallika's grandpa -- my dear old dad -- will pick her up at lunchtime and take her to my parents' house till the end of the workday.  This is primarily to allow Mohan to wrap up all the final details for filing his dissertation and graduation in May.  And it's also an opportunity for my parents and Mallika to spend more time together.  I am very grateful and very pleased that they've taken on this daily responsibility.  But, oh my, I haven't quite been prepared for the heavy, heavy weight in my chest that comes with realizing I won't see my baby in the middle of the day.  Oh my.  You never miss the water till the well runs dry. 

I can't count the number of times seeing Mallika has saved me, saved my sanity, saved my spirit, because I got to see her, hear her shrieking dance of delight when she saw me in her classroom door, scoop her up in my arms, ask her how her day was, negotiate the very lengthy routine of leaving her school.  This routine was usually:  say bye to the class, visit the babies across the hall, drink two times from the water fountain, make sure I get some water too, say bye to the director, visit the pre-K class where they have a fish tank, a super nice teacher, totally fun toys, a doll house, a baby carriage, a kitchen, and magnetic marbles, then climb the stairs, get the stroller, touch all the nametags, sit on the window ledges outside the door, push the stroller (BY HERSELF, AMMA) down the alley, point out the funny wires protruding from a pipe, check another broken pipe for running water, and finally climb into the stroller for conversation, singing, and direction-giving on the walk home.

We have had lots of conversations on the walk home, and I'm often serenaded by quiet, lively toddler tunes.  My favorite stretch of our walk is beneath the huge live oaks between the Ransom Center and Guadalupe.  They are entirely gorgeous, no matter what time of year, one of the last few really beautiful things at UT.  There are so many wonderful things we see to comment on, and we run into friends and acquaintances with great regularity. 

I am so deeply going to miss this routine with Mallika.  She makes my whole day worthwhile.

Peace,
Briana